~EPIC (AND MOSTLY LEGAL) WAYS TO QUIT YOUR JOB~

* Tattoo “I” on one buttcheek and “Quit!” on the other. Drop pants.* Giant foam middle finger* Well, first you’ll need 200 squirrels and the key to the supply closet…* Two words: mariachi band* Wrap towel around fist, punch timeclock* Google your hot coworker… without a computer* Streak the cafeteria. Stop to make a salad.* Sing “I Believe I Can Fly” while riding your swivel chair through the lobby* Forget to flush… for a month* Re-create the closing scene of An Officer and A Gentleman, with yourself as Richard Gere and your cat as Debra Winger* Engage your boss in an hour-long game of “I know you are, but what am I?”* Commandeer the warehouse forklift for a trip to Hardee’s* Respond to every customer question with “That’s what she said!”